What Martial Arts Taught Me About Masculinity
A voyage into the roots of toxic masculinity.
When I tell people “I love fighting”, they usually give me a strange look.
My fascination with combat began when I was a young kid. It started with cartoons like Batman and Teen Titans. Some of my earliest memories are of playing pretend and reenacting Dragon Ball Z with my dad in our living room. Imagine pillow fights, except 10 times more fun.
Fast forward 20 years later, and I am an adult who’s obsessed with Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. I’m close to getting my black belt.
During my journey in Jiu-Jitsu, I’ve competed internationally and trained with everyone from black belt world champions to UFC veterans. I’ve traveled the country sleeping in fighter barracks, on mats, and even on the floor using my gi as a blanket.
I surround myself with men who define themselves through graceful displays of violence. Our environment is aggressive, competitive, and no bullshit is tolerated. By all mainstream definitions, it’s an environment plagued by toxic masculinity.
Yet, I love it.
These men are my best friends, and this “toxic” environment is my home away from home.
